Monday, September 10, 2012

Midnight musings...

Ye of little faith....

This describes me.  To the exact letter.

I spent the last 6 months really really anxiously anticipating my move out here to Boston.  I made and remade budgets.  I e-mailed my financial aid counselor repeatedly....so much so that I think she can't stand me now.  I went over the details of this huge shift in my life over and over, and still in my mind, I could see it not working out.  I could see it falling flat.  I could see myself moving here...hating it...wishing I hadn't taken out the student loans...wishing I hadn't uprooted my life....trying to figure out a way to backtrack and reclaim it all.

And here I am.  And there is zero of that remorse.  In fact, the longer I'm here, the more and more excited I get about what I'm doing here.  I was just talking to one of my best friends on the phone today saying that I desperately miss everyone....but not so desperately that I'm falling apart.  I miss them because I love them and they are my support system, but I'm also doing just fine with them at a distance.  Best case scenario...really.  Because my first week that I left for undergrad at WSU, I almost lost my mind.  After being here 10 days, I still have mine intact.  Making progress.

I really feel like I'm supposed to be here.  What for I don't know...but I do know it's not about me. I could do this anywhere.  Every door opened wide for me to come here at this time and under these circumstances, so I'm convinced God has something in store...he always does.

So, today was the official start of classes and my internship.  Class was just as I expected class to be...long....wordy....but worthwhile.  You know, where you know you will learn a lot, but it won't necessarily be fun while doing it.  That kind of class.  It is covering my least favorite subject, but it has what I think will be the coolest assignment.  We are going to be doing macro based case studies on a community within Boston.  Now, I have a raging love affair for the North End, which is a predominantly Italian-American population.  I also know NOTHING about this population, so there ya go.  Found my case study.  We, although this is nerve wracking and a little ridiculous that I'm looking forward to this, get to go out in the community and interview members of that neighborhood.  We get to ask questions about who the respected community leaders are, what people's experiences are, how a changing cityscape has altered their community, and what their perceived strengths and weaknesses are.  The North End is home to most of the historical sites that we think of as being "Boston" (aka the Old North Church, Paul Revere's House, etc...), but this is a really vibrant Italian neighborhood now...where little old men sit on their doorsteps and watch the world move around them.  I love it.  I can't wait.

My internship is also going to be great.  I have an office, with my name on the outside of the door. I get to decorate it however I want.  I also am reviewing cases and have just received my own first case, and am going to be working with some really different people than I worked with at the House of Charity.  Starting school has really put a lot of my work last year in perspective.  I was SO burnt out by the end of the two years at House of Charity that I was running on empty.  Coming here and getting fresh perspective and additional education will help me figure out my past experiences and delve into new ones with a greater appreciation for the people I'm serving.  Just an idea of what I'm going to be doing.  My first case is already breaking my heart. When you hear of a mother of 6 that is sleeping on the floor in her apartment in the projects so that her newborn can sleep safely in the only open bed....it reaffirms why I want and need to be a part of this profession.  And I need to find that lady a crib!

So, as you can see, I'm settling in nicely.  The coming weeks should be REALLY fun!  I'm getting involved with a cool church in town called Park Street.  So, that is filling a lot of downtime I would have, but its allowing me to feel really connected with a church community again, which is REALLY good.  Also, my Dad is coming to town in two weeks, and that will be quickly followed by trips to NYC and New Hampshire!  So much to see and do before the weather gets cold!  Not to mention...Halloween!  I just ate 6 Halloween Oreos...I'm getting into the season.

Love you all!
P.S.  If you live in Spokane, just because I'm having fun doesn't mean I don't miss you.  Because I do.



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